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I had to learn that enjoying myself does not mean doing everything. Sometimes it means going for an hour instead of the whole evening. Sometimes it means sitting on the couch while others move around the kitchen. Sometimes it means saying no entirely and trusting that my relationships can hold that.

2017 was a year of upheaval. I moved halfway across the country. Started a new job in a field I had never worked in before. Met new people, explored new places, tried to build a life from scratch. And in the middle of all of that, my body began attacking itself. In the beginning of 2017 what I thought was run-of-the-mill knee pain from travel turned out to be the first signs of joint swelling from Rheumatoid Arthritis. Not a minor issue. Not something a little rest would fix.